What Do All Your Exes Have in Common?

By Taryn Galewind

Destined to Keep Dating the Same Type of Guy

Women often marry men like their fathers. That’s true no matter how good or bad their father-daughter relationship was, and the new relationship is often doomed to fail. Why do we do that, fail in the relationship, then do it again? We partner the same kind of guy, again and again, when we know such a pairing will make us miserable?

Experts say we’re attracted to men with characteristics that haven’t worked for us because, in our psyche, beneath our consciousness, we believe we can fix what went wrong the first time. Or the second. Or the third… Here’s how that works.

My father was a control freak. He believed that there are two ways to do anything – his way and the wrong way. He was a good man who loved his family in his way, but he felt he had to direct and micromanage. Not good for his offspring’s self-esteem. We grew up thinking we were put on Earth to do as we were told and to do it exactly to specifications. We were not supposed to reason at all; our purpose was to do the right thing.

I married a man who adored my father. They were wired the same way. When I met my mate, I saw the gentle, romantic, pleasing side of his nature and personality. My brain chemistry, designed to propagate our species, blinded me to the negatives, letting me bask in the things that made him seem like every woman’s dream. He looked sparkly and appealing.

As time went on, brain chemistry subsided and I discovered my spouse was like my father. He seemed to think my brilliance, which he had loved at first, had diminished. He was convinced I needed someone to point me in the right directions. I felt smothered and was determined to fix him. We were both wrong.

We acted out the clashes I had had with my father. Over and over, as I tried to convince my husband that his approach was wrong, I saw something confusing. In those arguments, I felt like the child my dad had scolded and yelled at. I felt powerless, incapable of making good choices. I desperately needed to defend my own capabilities—to my dad.

But I was a grown woman facing my husband, not my father. We had adult concerns and adult decisions to make. I was, and am, a capable woman, not an errant child. But somewhere, my psyche was still trying to close old issues with my dad and resolve the relationship I had had with him. I needed my husband to be like my dad, so I could finish the troubles of my childhood and heal myself. There’s a scientific name for it—the Placebo Syndrome.

Many women try to fix old problems in new relationships. Some women have even felt they repeated relationship challenges from a past life, another incarnation, and have sought help in past-life regression readings. But no matter where that past conflict took place, you will find it tough to have a healthy, happy, fulfilling partnership until you sort out the true nature of the issues you’re battling.

These problems we carry from one partner to the next can last a lifetime if we don’t find the core issue and close it. If you want success with a life partner, clearly recognize some things:

• Your past issues are in the past. Make peace with them—you can’t fix them through other people.

• There is only one person you can change, and that’s you. You can’t fix another person.

• When you have an argument or disagreement with a partner, spouse, or lover, remain in the present moment.

• Seek partners who treasure who you really are, allow you to grow, and desire to live in the present with you. Give yourself the gift of total acceptance, banishing the past to where it belongs. We can learn and grow from our experiences but we cannot travel in time to alter or adjust what has already happened.

Finding Joy

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To Your Sights!!!

Hindsight can be so clear.  It is easy to look back in our lives and think, "Wow, I should have seen that; I should have known that."

 

Hindsight has much clarity.  Perhaps we could bring that clarity also to our foresight and our insight.  We have the ability for these different types of 'sight.'  We do have hindsight.  It helps us guide our direction now.  We can't have foresight but we can feel the pull of spirit pulling us and choose the direction we will take.   We can also have insight so we pay attention to what is working in the deep, deep parts of ourselves.

 

Heading into this weekend, enjoy your hindsight, your foresight and have some insight. 

 

The Power of positive Thinking!!!

By Holly Allender

Think Good Thoughts to Bring in What You Want

I remember a time in my life when I only saw the negative. If it was going to rain, I said I was going to forget my umbrella. No surprise, I would usually forget my umbrella when it rained. When I was applying for a job, I would say “I doubt I’ll get it.” And no doubt, I didn’t get it. Some people would say this kind of thinking is being realistic. Is iIf you think negatively, negative things will happen. I know this, because I practice this on a regular basis. A year ago, I was unemployed, and jobs were scarce. I interviewed for a place and really wanted to work there. I kept thinking about what it would be like to have the job, what it felt like to be employed again and how it would feel to finish a project at that job. I got the job.
It’s time you figured out why you’re being negative. Is it because you’re protecting yourself? Are you afraid that you will get hurt, be in a situation you can’t handle or get pushed outside your comfort zone?
Be aware when you think negatively. Then take a moment and ask yourself what’s going on. Once you figure that out, the next step is to catch yourself thinking negatively. Then give yourself a positive thought. Just as you believed in the negative thought, believe that the positive thought is real and the truth.
As Jonathan explained, our thoughts have power. Use them for good or bad, it’s all in how you want to move through life.

Male Archetypes-

Let’s get one thing straight at the outset. You can’t bully, plead, cajole, threaten, make rules, punish, clean up after or in any other way try to manipulate an immature male into behaving like a grownup. It didn’t work for his parents, and it won’t work for you, no matter what your relationship.
Maturity has to happen from the inside out. It cannot be forced or directed, but it can be inspired. Let’s define a mature person of either sex as someone who is inwardly secure and outwardly responsible.
In their ground-breaking book about masculine archetypes King, Warrior, Magician, Lover, Robert Moore and Douglas Gillette theorize that modern men have trouble achieving maturity because the old rites of passage, the events which defined the requirements of the next level, have been lost. I think we have so lost touch with mature masculine archetypes that we no longer have the capacity to even imagine how mature masculine energy could and should behave. Witness government and Wall Street.
What you can do to improve this situation is re-learn how the mature masculine functions, and start expecting mature behavior in both your personal and professional relationships.
It will help you to know a bit about the major masculine archetypes, because you might be surprised to find that what you had labeled as immature is actually healthy… just not what you want. And a mature man often exhibits more than one archetype at the same time.
Masculine Archetypes
The King – The two primary functions of the King archetype are ordering or organization, and fertility or blessing. He is the Father in both physical and social terms. The immature King can be a tyrant or weakling, using whichever method will achieve his aim of total domination. The mature King, like the legendary King Arthur, sees to the well-being of the corporation or community by creating laws, policies, maps and other structures which bring order, and leads by his example.
The Warrior – This archetype has been driven underground in today’s world, giving plenty of room to its shadow expressions of abuser, bully, coward and terrorist. The mature Warrior is action-oriented, decisive, highly controlled and motivated by devotion to a cause or ideal. The positive Warrior is still a destroyer, but before he acts, he steps back to be sure that his act of destruction will serve the greater good. The Warrior in combination with other archetypes confers both strength and depth.
The Magician – Moore and Gillette identify the Magician as both a theoretician and a master of technology. Anything which requires special training is the province of the Magician, whether it’s high finance or quantum physics, shamanism or psychoanalysis. The immature Magician appears as a know-it-all, practical joker or manipulator. Detached and thoughtful, the Magician understands and masters the use of raw power, and in his maturity tames that power for the benefit of others.
The Lover – The Lover is about the sensual, in terms of both sexual expression and sensitivity to the beauty and delight of all aspects of the physical world, from Nature to art to eroticism. The Lover is often powerfully empathic and even psychic, and he sees and experiences the world through an artist’s sensibilities. An immature Lover can be impotent or a sex addict, a Mama’s boy, or all dreams and no action.
The Shepherd – This archetype was not discussed in Moore and Gillette’s book, but I’ve met him many times. An immature Shepherd could be a Mama’s boy, or one who gives as a way to buy love and approval. A mature Shepherd can be a father, minister, CEO or physician, but in any guise he is personally concerned with the well-being of each individual in his flock, as well as that of the collective.
What can you do to assist in a rebirth of the mature masculine? Now that you know a bit about what mature archetypes look like, and how they operate, the most important thing you can do is to act as though that these mature expressions of archetypal energy can and should be a part of your everyday reality.
You can also elicit their mature expression by recognizing the immature version and, through discussion, work assignments, joint projects and other co-creative actions, give the mature masculine hidden beneath the bad behavior a chance to express itself, and then reward it when it does. You’ll be healing our world every time you encourage and strengthen the mature expression of these vital masculine energies!

How can you turn apathy into passion...

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Nurture your Ideas!!!

While traveling, I once came upon a great article by Warren Buffet.  He was speaking to what is called the "Law of Gestation;" the amount of time required from seed to full growth.  There is a certain amount of time required for an acorn to become a mighty oak tree; there is an amount of time required for each thing.

 

He said honoring that there is an amount of time required is one of the best things.  Most people start something and give up on the idea or project before it comes to fruition.  They pull up the roots looking for the fruit when the seeds hadn’t even been given time to grow into a fruit tree.

 

If you’ve planted some seeds of ideas or projects, give it some time.  Keep nurturing.  Water those ideas.  Dig deep in the soul of becoming and let your ideas become results. 

 

Warren Buffet said that some things, no matter how great the talent or effort --some things just take time.  "You can’t produce a baby in one month by getting nine women pregnant."  It made me laugh.  I hope it does you, too.

 

Nurture Your Ideas,

Take The Opportunity...

Isaac Newton once said that if two angels were sent down from heaven --one to conduct an empire and the other to sweep the streets --they would feel no inclination to change employment because an angel would know that no matter what we are doing, it's an opportunity to bring joy, deepen our understanding and expand our life.

Even the smallest moments in life can be food for our spiritual quest.  For example, if you are waiting in a long line, use the moment to enjoy those around you, savor the sights and sounds; find peace in just being there for that brief time. 

Every single moment can be food --even the smallest moments --food for our spiritual growth.

Real versus Fake Confidence

By Aine Belton

Genuine confidence has nothing to do with arrogance. In fact, it is its opposite.

Arrogance is essentially a compensation for feelings of inadequacy, whereas confidence comes from being self-valuing, self-validated, and having faith in yourself and your ability to cope.

Arrogance is not fake confidence per se, which can manifest in a number of ways, but it certainly is one way it rears its head.

Real confidence does not try to prove. It does not seek attention to quench self-doubt, and exudes a natural charisma and magnetism. Essentially, it enables you to shine more of the love, light and joy that you are, and your true, happy, nature.

When you are genuinely confident you are naturally radiant and attractive. People love being around confident people because it rubs off on them and gives them permission to be the same.

Confidence is not necessarily loud. In fact, it is very often quiet, yet it is not afraid to speak its truth or express itself freely when desired or appropriate.

False confidence, however, can be noisy in its attempt to prove and attain outside validation. Proving, however, never yields positive results, as people can often sense the self-doubt that lies beneath it, and even if you do receive the approval you are seeking, you will not feel truly satiated, and a sense of hollowness will return.

Before we look at steps to attaining genuine confidence, I want to touch on a few important points.

Firstly, don’t be hard on yourself if you’re more on the false confidence side of things! Everyone can be at certain times and in certain areas of life, or at least likely have been at one time or another. It may be the only way you have known how to compensate for a lack of self-belief, for example, and that’s OK! What you don’t need to do is to pile on any self-judgments, as this will only knock you down.

Pat yourself on your back for doing your best, and love and accept yourself for who and where you are right now!

Being inauthentic doesn’t make you bad or wrong. People are usually inauthentic because they believe (falsely) that who they are is not enough in some way.

Bravado is an attempt to compensate for feelings of valuelessness, but, of course, it never works, and even if it does temporarily, a feeling of emptiness will recur, as you can only truly be filled up from the inside.

Self-esteem comes from within. No amount of approval or validation ‘out there’ will ever give it to you. You can though!

Start by being honest with yourself about how you feel about yourself, and accept yourself wherever you are in your life. Being honest and intimate with yourself and acknowledging your feelings is a way to love and honour yourself. It is also a precursor to change, for what you recognize and acknowledge you can do something about.

Negative feelings about yourself can be rooted in negative self- concepts and beliefs that can be largely traced back to childhood experiences and early programming. There are resources available nowadays for working to clear limiting beliefs you can explore (including NLP, EFT, Theta Healing, Psych-K, the Belief Buster Kit, and others).

There are many things that can shape how and who you are – life events, beliefs, personal energies and tendencies, strengths and weakness, choices, etc. What’s important to know, however, is that you can decide who you want to be!

The power of CHOICE is always in your hands!

You have free will. You are a powerful CREATOR, far more powerful than you may yet be aware. You can change, grow, evolve, heal and transform. You can blossom and bloom into all that you wish to be!

Choice is your most powerful resource, more powerful even than your beliefs, for it is through choice that you can CHANGE those beliefs!

Self-forgiveness is another powerful catalyst that initiates transformation, releasing more of what you are not so you can unveil and step into more of who you truly are.

It’s always important to be kind and compassionate with yourself. As you accept yourself as you are, you more easily let go of what you’re not. Rather than fixing, you need revealing, for who you TRULY are is… AMAZING!

Start believing in you, and when you do, the world will too! 

Don’t identify with your shadow self or condemn yourself for perceived flaws or failings. Judgment only compounds that which it judges. You are not your mistakes. Whatever you have experienced in your life is part of your human journey, and every problem can hide a gift.

The only thing wrong with you is ever thinking there’s anything wrong with you!

Own your inherent innocence and worth. You are a spark of love and light. Own your goodness and truth, and be loving and kind to yourself.

You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe , deserve your love and affection .” ~Buddha

The more you love and value yourself, the more you be able to share that love with others, stand in your power, and experience true confidence.

Start by forgiving yourself for any perceived negative attributes. You are human, you may make mistakes, yet those mistakes do not define you, or certainly never should, for they are not who you are

Creative Visualization

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Finding the Perfect Job

by W. Mason Preddy

I worked as a healthcare recruiter for an awesome community hospital. In my time there, I was responsible for helping achieve record-low vacancy rates (there is a worldwide shortage of healthcare professionals) and increasing retention. I started new programs, and was responsible for applying for national and local awards, many of which we won. We then merged with a chain of hospitals in the area.

My position was eliminated, and I was devastated. I couldn’t understand how they could do something so nasty to someone who had given them so much. I received a severance package and was able to use some of the money to work on a double master’s certificate program from Tulane University. In looking back and examining what had happened, I realized that the work environment had really become miserable, and it was not a fun place to work anymore.

At first, I had my sights set on joining a consulting firm that did work in the healthcare industry. They were interested in me, and I went through a series of interviews. I was constantly writing affirmations that I got this job with “X” company, making “X” amount, etc. The job required constant travel—four or five days every week all over the country. While this was really not appealing to me, I told myself I would like it and it would be okay. Well, you can’t “trick” the Universe!

It knows just by the way you feel. I didn’t get the job. I was upset but knew that all the travel would have been a real drag. A series of other opportunities came along, and for various reasons, either I wasn’t interested when I learned more or I didn’t get the job. I continued to write affirmations with each position. What I didn’t realize is that you are not supposed to be telling the Universe “how” or “who,” etc. You are supposed to let the Universe handle that for you. That is a very difficult thing to do.

I decided to quit writing so many affirmations and just start concentrating on the way I felt. Looking back at the other jobs, I knew they really weren’t the best jobs for me, but I kept telling myself they would be great and everything would work out. Instead, I started talking about what I really wanted in a job. I would write an occasional affirmation, but rather than naming the company, I let the Universe work on what the organization would be. I just focused on what was important to me.

I wanted flexibility, to make a lot of money, to be happy at what I was doing, to like my co-workers and have them like me, to have the “perfect amount” of travel to pleasant places, and to be successful at what I was doing. Well, the Universe has presented me with an awesome new opportunity—with all of the above. I am very excited and start soon!

The major things I learned were: Don’t worry about the “how.” That is the job of the Universe. When something doesn’t work out, know that something better will come along. The Universe had a plan for me, and even though I was disappointed along the way, it has all worked out perfectly. This opportunity will definitely make me the happiest and has all the things I wanted. 

Message: Focus on what you want and let the Universe handle how to bring it to you. 

A Surprising Way to Start Healing Your Soul ...

 Any blow to your vanity, received consciously, is a healing touch to your soul.

Treasure the Truth About Yourself

By Sir Guy Finley

In this world, it's possible for you to find physical gold, but without winning the war within yourself, this wealth could not do anything for you other than perhaps produce a more comfortable place in which to continue your struggle with old conflicts. However, there is an inner gold you can find whose possession fulfills you, regardless of your external circumstances. We can call this inner gold "real self-knowledge": truths you know about yourself, for yourself andfrom yourself through your self-study. It's yours because you've visited the world where this new kind of gold exists; you've mined it yourself, and you've put it in your pocket. This gold can never be taken from you. Its goodness is yours forever. This new inner wealth enriches you by transforming your very own ideas about who you are and what you really want from life. With it, everything gets simpler. And the nicest thing about this special spiritual gold is that you can have as much of it as you're willing to pay for.

On the other hand, and it warrants this short warning,nothing is as easy, and even secretly flattering as it can be, than to read certain books that build our self-images as being wise and "spiritual." These books, however, contain a subtle sort of spiritual "fool's gold" that keeps us trapped in an imaginary world. By contrast, real self-knowledge can be a little difficult to take at first, delivering well-aimed blows to our vanity as it shows us how limited and artificial our self-created thought-world has been. But it also provides a glimpse of the expansive world that awaits us... if we will treasure the truth about ourselves that it alone can reveal.

Financial Infidelity: Recover From a Cheating Partner

By Eric J. Leech

Your Partner Cheated on You With the Credit Cards and Checkbook… Now What?

As surveys continue to collect information about financial infidelity in relationships, it has been suggested there may be a lot more people currently being cheated on then we realize. According to the numbers, approximately 30 percent of all couples sharing money have lied to their partner about finances, which includes secret purchases and hidden credit cards/bank accounts. In addition, as many as 25 percent of couples have withheld financial information from their partner, which may include bank/credit card statements, yearly earnings, and personal debt.
These indiscretions may seem harmless, but what these liars don’t realize is that over 70 percent of cases of financial infidelity will be found out eventually, and 42 percent of these relationships will experience a steep drop in trust because of it. One fourth of those in committed relationships claim it is more important for their partner to be honest about their finances than about an extramarital affair. This would explain why statistics also suggest 16 percent of relationships experiencing financial infidelity end in divorce, and 11 percent will go through a trial separation until their partner seeks help.
These are some pretty bleak statistics, but let’s roll up our sleeves and see what you can do to put the odds back into your favor?
1. Get the Facts
The first step of financial infidelity is to collect all the facts. You need to see just how much cheating has been going on. You can order a free credit report, which will give you a lowdown of the situation. While most infidelity falls under the occasional pair of shoes or garage tool, there have been cases of partners purchasing vehicles, homes for mistresses, and stealing money out of joint accounts.
2. Understand That a Bigger Problem May Exist
Couples experiencing financial infidelity are often just scratching the surface of the root of the problem. Deceitful spending has many unpleasant origins, which may include infidelity, insecurity, addiction, and revenge. As you’d expect, hidden spending can be a red flag for an affair. It takes money to keep a mistress happy, so if their cover has been blown, pay attention to what the money was being used for (hotels, jewelry stores, airfare, etc.). Insecure partners may also hide money as a means to feel more secure in their relationships, putting it away for a rainy day, so to speak. Be aware that this action can be the pre-stages to a divorce.
Checkbook cheating can be an attempt to fill a void in your partner’s life. Multiple thrill purchases can give some cheaters a momentary high, also known as medicated spending. Addictive personalities may find secretive spending a means to continue a bad habit, such as alcohol, gambling, drugs, or prostitution. Financial infidelity can also be used to get revenge for a wrong your partner feels was done to them. In most cases, however, cheating with the checkbook or credit cards is mostly about buying something that they knew you’d most likely not approve of, so they purchased it without you knowing. This leads to the next course of action, setting aside a slush fund.
3. Set Aside a Slush Fund
If your investigations have not uncovered any serious problems, one way to curb hidden spending is to allow each other a certain allowance to spend on whatever you want each month. It could be as minimal as $20, or as high as $300. The important thing is that the two of you agree to the amount, and promise to stick to it. This slush fund will give both partners enough freedom to enjoy some of their favorite indulgences, while also keeping a cap on the amount of trouble they can get into. If there is an item that will cost more than the monthly allowance, they can either save up for it, or sit down and talk it over to decide if it fits in the budget.
4. Improve Communication
Financial infidelity is as much a breakdown in communication, as a red flag for other problems. Communicating and understanding is a key component to avoiding fiscal misunderstandings. As a couple, you should be able to talk about future purchases and make compromises where necessary. Make time once a month to discuss your budget. Keep these discussions light and friendly, without lecture or blame. Your goal should be to fortify your partnership, while also allowing for (reasonable) individual indulgence.

4 Ways to Spot a Parasitic Relationship

By definition, a parasitic relationship is one in which an organism (parasite) lives off of another (host), causing the organism harm and potential death. It is easy to identify these kinds of relationships in nature, but they are not always as quickly spotted among human partnerships. Here are a few signs that your partner bears a closer resemblance to Lothario the Leech than Lancelot the Loyal Lover.
1. Psychic Vampires
Do you often find yourself feeling depleted or drained after spending time with your partner? It’s important to look at your energy levels—spiritually, emotionally and physically—after time spent with your mate. Your long acquaintance with this behavior may blind you to it and its harmful effects. Heighten your awareness levels so that you can spot the specific emotions and feelings that arise from spending time with your partner.
2. One-Sided Favors
Are the favors your partner needs from you excessive? Again, this may be something you are so accustomed to that it will take some reflection and awareness to bring it to light. Both partners should naturally want to help one another, but all relationships require a certain amount of give and take; as soon as your mate demands more than he or she can return, you are allowing them to take advantage of you. If you are running around all day doing favors for them with little to no reciprocity, you have most certainly fallen into a parasitic relationship.
3. The Go-To Person
Have you become the go-to person regarding every problem and need in your partner’s life? It’s great for couples to rely on one another for certain things, but no one should ever be another person’s co-dependent savior. In healthy relationships, each person is independent and relies upon him or herself first and foremost. If your partner needs your help in every aspect of his or her life, their neediness becomes your barnacle.
4. Inability to Support
In a parasitic relationship—no matter how much your partner may love you—by the very nature of his dependency, he will be unable to fully support you in your time of need. Such partners may want to or attempt to, but when the time comes, they will, inevitably, fall short of the challenge. Most likely they will have seemingly valid excuses as to why they have not been able to come through for their partner; and their excuses may be accurate because their entire life has revolved around depending on others to survive. The end result, though, leaves you, the giving partner, carrying the burden and responsibility not only for your own life, but for your mate’s as well. Much as you may wish to, this is not a burden you can carry for long.

The Secret to Being Liked by Everyone

By Donald Michael Kraig

When you are a healer of any sort, from licensed doctor or dentist to hypnotherapist, from massage technician to mother nurturing a child’s scraped knee, the person you are helping does better if they like you. With hypnotherapy, if your clients don’t like you, they are less likely to go into hypnosis, a necessity for the therapy’s success.

Being liked, however, isn’t limited to healing situations. If you’re applying for a job and the person doing the hiring doesn’t like you, even if you’re more qualified than any other applicant, you’re unlikely to get the job. If you run a company, whether it has two or two thousand employees, the more the people who work for the company like you the more they are likely to be more productive. And if you’re looking for a romantic partner, you just have to be likable!

Some people believe that in order to be liked you have to be born with those intangible qualities that make you likeable. Either you’ve got charisma or you don’t. And, these people believe, the majority of us who don’t have charisma or don’t seem very likeable are just fated to be unpopular, unsuccessful, and unhappy.

Don’t you believe it!

Being likable is a skill that you can acquire. In fact, it’s actually a very easy skill to develop. Some “experts” will give you a series of simple things to do to become more popular. The problem with these solutions is that they falsely assume that everyone you’re trying to get to like you is the same. They’re not, and that makes developing likeability skills, also known as “establishing rapport,” a bit more challenging. But with a little bit of awareness, anyone can do it… and that means you can do it, too!

The Basic Rule of Likeability

Surprisingly, there is just one rule to understand when it comes to being liked:

People like people who are most like themselves.

If you remember nothing else about this article, please remember this basic rule. It means that the more you are like another person, the more that other person will like you. Of course there is no way you can really know everything about another person. You can’t know every aspect of their background and history. Plus, you are a unique individual and different from everyone else. So you can’t be exactly like another person. Besides, most people are smart enough to know if you are pretending to be just like them.

But there is something you can do. It’s called modeling, and the idea behind it is that you simply act similarly to a person you want to get to like you. Note that I wrote “similarly,” not “the same.” If you act the same as another person he or she will think you’re mocking them and will neither like what you’re doing nor like you.

The secret is to observe the actions and listen to the words of a person you want to like you. Then take on some of those actions and words in a way that is not the same as the original, but reminds on an unconscious level that you are like them. Don’t give your responsive action immediately after they do an action. Wait until the time is right. Here are some examples:

• If someone crosses their legs, at an opportune moment, cross your ankles.

• If someone leans forward, at an opportune moment, lean forward in a slightly different manner, perhaps leaning slightly to the side.

• If someone makes repeated motions with one of their hands, at an opportune moment make a similar motion with your opposite hand. For example, if they turn their right hand palm up, turn up your left hand. This is called mirroring.

• If someone smiles, at an opportune moment you should smile.

• If someone strokes their chin, at an opportune moment touch your face.

• If someone keeps repeating a word or phrase such as “you know,” occasionally, when appropriate, use that expression.

Do you get the idea? You are simply showing that you are like another person. The result of these simple actions is that they will naturally like you. The most difficult part of this technique is that it needs to appear natural. You might want to practice with some friends a few times before actually putting it into action.

Success Mastery X Motivational Audio

Greg Frost is a bestselling author and self improvement coach who has helped thousands of people worldwide achieve their dreams. He believes that it is “Choice, not chance that determines destiny.” Born within a middle‐income family, he has struck out on his own and achieved great success in his relationships, career, health and life. His dream is to touch and improve the lives of at least 10 million people worldwide. Click for the free Audio here :-) http://www.successmasteryx.com/content/1wealth.php

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Recognize Your Power

"If you think you can or you think you can't, you are right."  

 

I’ve heard that quote before and I've shared that quote with you before.  Sometimes, when we think we've heard something, we stop paying attention to how powerful that can be as we dig into the deeper meanings of it.

 

There are things going on in all of our lives right now.  Occasionally, it's tempting to begin to think, "That's not going to work out," or "I just can't."  If I think I can or I think I can't…Because the genesis of all things is thinking.

 

Everything happens twice; first in thought and then in life.  Let's recognize the power of what we are believing in with our thinking.  If we think we can or we think we can't, we get to be right. 

 

Recognize Your Power!!!

How do we create meaning?

Nothing in life has any meaning besides the meaning we give it.
How do we create meaning?  In many cases we are programmed by our
culture and the people around us.  The truth is that all meaning is
subjective.  Some of us are taught that having designer clothes, a
perfect body and having a lot of money is the true meaning of
success. In other cultures having a loin cloth, a lip plate, long
earlobes and living off the land is the true meaning of success.

Some of us are taught that death is sadness and others believe it is
joyful because we get rid of our warn-out bodies so our spirit can
move on and have more fun!

Imagine you are in the ocean and you are a poor swimmer. Behind you
is a huge wave. Now what do you think? Do you think what an
exciting and fun wave? No! You're scared as hell. Now imagine you
are an experienced surfer and the same wave comes up behind you.
You say, "Cool. Hang ten. What a wave dude". Did the wave change?
Obviously it was just the meaning you gave to it.

If nothing in life has any meaning besides what you give to it then
your experiences in life have nothing to do with what is happening
in your life, but everything to do with the meaning you attach it
to.

Understanding that you can choose the meaning to the events in your
life gives you a tremendous power to change the quality of your
experiences, the quality of your results and the quality of your
life.

If you feel angry or upset ask yourself, "What does my reaction to
this say about me?" In other words, what do I have to believe to
experience the emotions I am experiencing right now in this
situation?  In short, you define your own experiences.  You create
your own meaning.

Guided Meditation

Meditation has been around for thousands of years and is found in
virtually all religions. But, the act of meditation itself, is not
particularly religious. It is the act of freeing the mind from the
constant barrage of outside stimuli, and/or internal dialogue
humans are constantly having with themselves; and helping the two
halves of the brain to work in tandem with each other.

The idea of traditional meditation is to relinquish all your
thoughts and concentrate fully onto a single subject. For instance,
a koan, which is a kind of unsolvable riddle, like, "What is the
sound of one hand clapping?", or a mantra, which is a particular
word, phrase or sound. It might simply be to focus on your
breathing.

When a thought comes up that is other than what your focus is on,
you simply accept that it happened & let it go, and refocus. You
may get aggravated with how often this happens at first, but don't
worry about it. Without having a teacher, most people get
discouraged by this lack of mental discipline, and end up quitting.

Instead of giving up, they would be better served if they got a
recorded audio track of guided meditation. These usually begin with
instructions, step by step, explaining what to do to achieve a
meditative mental state. These states are usually indicated by the
brain producing primarily alpha waves. (That is the type of
brainwaves produced when you first start to fall asleep.)

Then the guided meditation will usually involve you in a series of
personal visualizations and story telling, where you will see
yourself accomplishing specific goals you have set for yourself. It
will usually evoke feelings and emotions, as if you have already
accomplished them.

Guided meditation is a blend of hypnosis and meditation. It is not
classic meditation because it relies on outside stimuli, but it is
just a step away from it. It uses hypnotic induction, to guide you
into an altered state which not only relieves stress, but can help
you to program your mind to accomplish your goals. Many success
stories emphasize the role of guided meditation as part of a daily
agenda.

Tips for the Novice Meditator

To begin with it can be useful to find a teacher that has
experience and is respected. Of course you can learn how to mediate
alone without any assistance but it is usually easier to seek
guidance of an individual that has a large amount of knowledge.
This would help you to clarify any doubts you may feel.

It is important to find a location where you will not be
continuously disturbed. This is vital as meditation requires an
atmosphere that is peaceful and has no external distractions. Turn
off your cell phone and if there is noise coming in through a
window then close it. You may find it extremely worthwhile to
attend a mediation center initially where you can be given expert
assistance and be surrounded by people with similar outlooks and
desires. Most regions now have Vipasana centers which offer
residential programs.

One of the most common mistakes that beginners make is to spend too
much energy on their posture. It is possible to meditate in any
position including standing or lying down. The primary
consideration is to be comfortable. If you constantly have aches
and pains when trying to meditate then this will distract your mind
from the practice. The posture you choose should be comfortable for
a prolonged amount of time.

If you want to get the best results form meditation then you should
practice as often as you physically can, preferably on a daily
basis. In some ways it is no different that activities like sport
in so much that the more time spent doing it the easier it will
become, eventually it will be second nature.

You'll need to understand how to relax your mind and body through
your breath. When you close your eyes focus on your in breath and
then your exhalation rather than the thoughts that enter the mind.
By doing this you will soon discover that any negativity quickly
evaporates.

Be aware that there are no hard and fast rules for correct
meditation. Even those of us that have been using mediation in our
lives for many years will not all practice the same techniques. Try
out a few methods until you find one that suits your location,
lifestyle, and body. Whether you do your meditating at the start of
the day or in the evening will depend upon your own lifestyle and
preference.

Are you an optimist or a pessimist?

 Psychologist Martin Seligman,
the godfather of the positive psychology moment, conducted
extensive research in optimists versus pessimists. What he found
was optimism can be learned. He discovered that optimists
consistently talk about what they are rather than what they are
not, or what they have instead of what they don't have. Pessimists
have one thing in common, they talk about why things are not the
way they should be and what they don't have.

We are not born pessimists. In fact, all children are optimists
until we program them differently. Stand outside any amusement park
on any given weekend and talk to the families that exit. Kids come
out and you ask them, "What did you think of the park?" The gush,
"Oh that was so cool!" Now talk to the parents and here is what
they say, "Lines are too long".  "Food was overpriced". "The damn
noise and crowds get on my nerves". So is the amusement park a
happy place or a place from hell? The answer is - it is neither. It
depends on the meaning we give to it.

How did we go from being born optimists to being pessimists?
Somewhere along the way we were trained not to be optimistic in
case things don't work out.  If you are too optimistic and things
don't work out you will be very disappointed.  But if you are
pessimistic and they don't work out you will be less disappointed
and of course, you will be "right".

Seligman also states that we can learn or relearn how to be
optimistic. According to his research optimists outperform
pessimists ten to one!  Maybe it is time to reprogram our thinking
and ask, "What is good about this situation?" and if we cannot find
the good, ask, "What does my reaction to this say about me?" This
can help you to become more of an optimist.

Today will bring you a new awareness, a lesson or a manifestation
that you are making progress - IF YOU LOOK FOR IT!  No matter how
large or small, please record it in your Evidence Journal. It will
only take a few moments and will AUTOMATICALLY put you in the Flow.

"The only darkness is Ignorance." - William Shakespeare

Fire Your Desire!
by Aine Belton

“Desire is the starting point of all achievement, not a hope, not a wish, but a keen pulsating desire which transcends everything.”
- Napoleon Hill

Desire breathes life into your dreams and fuels your imagination and expectation, enhancing your manifesting potential.
When you get in touch with your desire, your imagination, along with all the positive thoughts and feelings about your goal, are ignited.

To get in touch with the desire you have for a goal or dream, ask yourself:
“Why do I want this?”

As you answer the ‘Whys’, your passions and emotions stir, and your imagination flows.
Asking “Why?” also assists you in getting clear on the intent behind your goal and how true your goal is for you. It can also help to reveal hidden intentions and what’s really important to you. Perhaps you want a certain financial goal or a new career, because you are really looking for greater freedom, joy, interaction or social connection, for example, and you can then set additional or alternate goals to manifest those deeper wishes.
It can help you discern more of your true desires and what you are hoping a goal or dream will give you on other levels.
This exercise alone might shift and change your goals and dreams or generate new ones aligned to more of your heart’s deepest desires.
Sometimes what we think we want can be a product of the consensus, of what others want for us, of what we think we ‘should’ have, of what our ego thinks will gratify us, or of rationalizations rather than our heart’s desires. Asking “Why?” can be very revealing in this sense.

If you are out of touch with your desires and what you want to any degree, or have shut down your passion, get reacquainted with yourself and what juices you! Start by asking yourself the question, "What do I love?" Or "What would I love to be, do and have?"
Let your thoughts and feelings spill onto a page. Write passionately, freely, without analyzing anything you're writing, and let your heart express all that you love and that brings you joy. You might be surprised. Just be open and allow this deeper connection with yourself and your desires.
You can also ask yourself, “Where are my gifts, strengths and talents?”, for here you will also discover clues to your passions and desires. The gifts we have brought into this lifetime are things that when expressed and offered, when engaged and accessed, bring joy, fulfillment and satisfaction. They are things we desire to implement and share.

Sometimes people shut down their desire and passion, due to pain around not currently having what they want, or fear around never getting it and the disappointment that might ensue, so they keep a lid on feeling the extent and depth of this wonderful energy.

There is a difference between desire, and need, which it is often confused with, which I explore below.

Desire versus Need

There is a difference between desire, and need or desperation. Need and desperation are synonymous with feelings of lack and the absence of what you want, hence will repel your desired goal and perpetuate you not having it.
Desire, however, is a positive generating emotion. It fuels your imagination and positive feelings associated with your goal so integral to successfully attracting it.
Be passionate about your outcome yet remain light-hearted and unattached to ensure you don’t become needy or dependent on it.
One way to dissipate and release feelings of neediness, urgency or desperation, is to TRUST.
Trust in the positive outcome in your goal. Trust in the love and grace of the universe and the power of your heart and mind. Trust that you are on a co-creative journey, that there is a bigger picture, and that there is love, help and guidance available to you in every moment. Trust that the universe wants you to have what you desire as much as you do. Trust that you are loved more than you know and that the universe loves you more than you love yourself. Trust that what is in your highest interest will transpire, and let go of a need for one specific outcome.
Life doesn’t need to be a struggle, and you can have what you desire with belief, positive expectation and a willingness to receive.
Trust that if you let go of something, be that a person, thing or outcome, if it is for your best it will come back to you is for your highest good. If you truly desire it and are in energetic alignment with it (i.e. have congruent beliefs and take relevant action, etc.), you will manifest it if it.
It is holding on, neediness and attachment that ironically push away the very things you want.
You may notice this dynamic in relationships. It’s the same with all things. If you let go of something and it is for your best, it will be there. Relax, trust, loosen your grip, relinquish control and release your dreams and visions into the world. Trust, believe, open to receive and expect their materialization in your world.
If you are trying to hard to ‘make’ things happen or controlling, it means that a part of you doesn’t fully expect, believe or trust things will go your way, and this conflicting stance and energetic signal can interfere with your manifesting success.
If you are feeling a need to control or you are trying and struggling for success, it can be worthwhile to dig a little deeper to see if there are any faulty or limiting beliefs standing between you and your desires.
Instead of pushing or controlling to succeed, stop and breathe, and allow, attract and receive!

Split-Mind?

You might also have a split-mind or incongruent desires, where a part of you, perhaps consciously, wants one thing, yet another part of you – a hidden aspect of self that is not so conscious – wants something else.
As an example, perhaps you say you desire a loving committed relationship, yet keep attracting non-committal or unavailable types, distant relationships or ones that can’t go anywhere.

To see your drama clearly is to be liberated from it.”

- Ken Keyes

Becoming conscious is the first step on the road to freedom. By being conscious of what stands in the way of your dreams you can do something about it. Perhaps greater commitment, self-value, clarity, self-forgiveness or new beliefs are required.

Spiritual Awakening

by Janelle Sagen

My journey to gain knowledge about the Law of Attraction led me to a seminar given by Matthew Ferry and Thach Nguyen in March of 2007. I also met Rich German at this event. It was an amazing weekend-long experience. I sat with bated breath every day of that seminar, lucky to witness the countless miracles that were happening all around me as people from all over the country shared their stories.

Day two came and went, and I left that day feeling especially elated with what I’d learned. I didn’t realize that day’s session had gone an hour over, and I had a husband and two kids at home waiting for me. It all came to a head when I glanced down at my cell phone that had been set to vibrate and saw seven missed calls from home. At that very moment, my phone began to vibrate—another call from home. I picked up, still not aware of the time, and said hello to my husband.

He immediately fired back at me, “Where the hell are you?” I was so taken back; I had such an amazing day, and to get this kind of treatment from my husband was absolutely unimaginable. In an equally annoyed tone, I asked him, “What do you mean, ‘where am I?’ I’m on my way home from the seminar.” He asked me to look at the time and went on to really let me have it for not calling to let him know I was going to be late.

I immediately fired back at him, blaming him for ruining what was the best mood I’d been in since I could remember. I swiftly hung up on him, feeling ever so righteous for doing so. Then it dawned on me, what had I been learning for the past two days?

I immediately gave the hurt, resentment, anger, confusion, and hostility to the Universe; in my case that is God. I asked God to take away all the negative emotions that were blocking my feeling good at that moment. I began to breathe and feel the power of the Law of Attraction begin to work in my life. I declared to God that by the time I returned home, I would be back in complete alignment with my husband. Of course, I saw this alignment as my walking in the door, and my husband running over to me to greet me with a warm embrace and a soft kiss, and most importantly, an apology.

When I walked in the door, I walked up to him before realizing what I was doing, and I began to speak to him in a way that wasn’t the norm for me; I am rarely the “apologizer.” I went on to tell him how very sorry I was that I didn’t call him to tell him I’d be late. I apologized for his having to sit around and worry about my safety. I put myself in his shoes and really thought about what would serve him, not me. He had a look of confusion on his face that told me this was the Law of Attraction working here. But just to make sure I really saw it, God inspired my husband to ask about the seminar and what was taught that day, something that isn’t the norm for him.

I had shared my vision with fifty strangers that day but never my own husband. I went on to tell him my vision of being an author who writes inspirational books on self-healing that will one day save the lives of millions throughout the world. Even though a fight had been avoided, for some reason I still didn’t feel completely and utterly aligned with him. However, I went to bed having taken back that feeling of overwhelming peace I’d left the seminar with earlier.

The next morning was the last day of my seminar. I hurried out of the house as to not be late. I told my husband I would pay attention to the time and let him know if I was going to be late that day. He looked at me with a look I’d never seen him give me and said, “I guess I’m going to have to get used to your being gone.” I answered, “Why is that?” He responded, “Aren’t you going to be on a book tour soon?” It was at that moment I realized I’d achieved perfect alignment. What a magical moment of the Law of Attraction working in my life!

Message: Look within at what you are bringing to every situation. Let go of the fear of examining yourself and how people view you. Be willing to say “I’m sorry,” and smile as you reap every benefit.

Janelle Sagen’s journey to spiritual awakening began about three years ago and has led her on a wonderful path of self-discovery. She knows her true purpose on this earth is to inspire and deliver this message to as many people as possible through her poetry and coaching. Her vision is to reach out and teach people their true potential in life, to raise their consciousness, and create a more peaceful world.

Change The World Movie.

http://www.flickspire.com/m/DailyEnergize/ChangeTheWorld?lsid=b54fac2da25432cf8e7f7d51335e3ef3

The Junk In Your Head..

You ever pay attention to what you're thinking about? 
I mean really notice what thoughts are racing through your head.  
You have thousands of thoughts everyday, and I know no 
one can possibly keep track of every single thought.  
But every once in a while stop and pay attention to what your thinking about.  
There's a good chance you've got a lot of junk thoughts...
the kind that don't do any good, don't help you succeed 
and don't allow you to be happy.
 If you think about why you can't do something or why 
something won't work out - then those are junk thoughts.
 They don't do any good and only focus on the negative.
 If you constantly talk about what is wrong or why you can't
do something, then those are also junk thoughts and like .
junk they should be thrown out. Sent to the curb or banished
to a wasteland where they'll never be heard from again.
 Junk thoughts are really negative, meaningless thoughts.
 So why keep this junk in your head?
 Wouldn't you rather enjoy success and happiness? 
You can when you change your thoughts 
and create empowering beliefs that catapult you to a better life.
 Today I'll show you how to eliminate the 
negative thoughts, get rid of the junk in your head 
and create empowering thoughts and beliefs that
supercharge your subconscious so that you 
begin living the life you want and enjoy success. 

Negative thoughts serve no purpose, they're useless
and don't help you in any way.
 They just make you feel bad, and lead to 
negative beliefs which creates a negative lifestyle.
 They need to be replaced with that help you, allow 
you to succeed, create positive beliefs and lead to 
a positive, happy and rewarding life.
 So instead of having thoughts of worry, doubt, gloom and 
doom, or any negative thoughts, create positive thoughts that help you succeed.
 Instead of worrying about what might go wrong, think about what might go right.
 Think about how things could work out for you. 
Think about how you can improve your life, or try to find solutions.
 When you do this you direct your mind and 
subconscious mind to regularly focus on the positive things in your life.
 And you also direct your subconscious mind 
to create more positive situations and positive outcomes.
 If you constantly focus on what could go wrong 
you'll always create and attract situations that won't work out.
 If you regularly focus on how things could work out, 
and constantly focus on positive things,
you will attract situations and events that 
work out for you and you'll attract more 
positive events and people.
 Your subconscious mind will always create 
situations and events that you regularly think about. 
So start replacing those negative and useless 
thoughts with positive and constructive thoughts. 
Begin directing your mind and subconscious mind 
to create the life that you want and you'll begin 
achieving your goals sooner than you realize.

 Pay attention to your thoughts.
Observe them - and analyze them.
 Ask yourself: Does this thought or belief work for me? 
Does it help me? 
Does it make me feel better?
If the answer is no, then you have to change it. 
You can change the thought by simply thinking 
of the opposite or creating a new thought that 
helps you create what you want.
 For example: If you're constantly thinking about 
why you're not good enough or why you can't 
achieve something - change those thoughts. 
Think about why you are good enough and 
why you can achieve something.
 As you regularly think about why you can do 
something you'll start to believe that you can achieve that goal. 
The minute you begin to believe that you can do 
something your subconscious mind goes out and 
creates the situations to help you achieve that goal.
 Start changing your thoughts today.
Begin directing your mind and subconscious mind to 
help you live the life you want and achieve your goals .