The Secret of Getting What You Wish for From Others

We all know what it's like to find ourselves unhappy and in conflict with someone who just isn't giving us what we want or need from him or her. Whenever this happens we usually find fault with these people, judge them as being inadequate, and from these findings blame them for the negativity we now feel toward them. But how many of us are awake enough to offer these same people what we have asked them to give us -- before we ask them for it?

Even to attempt the following practice will reveal more to you about yourself than reading a thousand books on spiritual realization. To begin with, we usually demand from others those interior qualities that we are in short supply of ourselves. For instance, it is impatience that leaps to judge impatience. Unkindness finds others unkind -- and tells them so in no uncertain terms. Arrogance despises pride and makes sure that the proud know they are dreaming of unreal heights. On and on churns this cycle of disharmony until we go to work on ourselves, implementing the kind of true self-transforming principles that follow.

Whatever it may be that we find wanting in someone else, we must learn what it means to give that very thing to him or her. What we would have from others, or have them be towards us, we must provide or be ourselves.When we know we tend to be critical of others because they don't show us the respect we would have, we must show these same people the respect we want. If we wish for kindness, let it begin with our own. Otherwise all we give each other are unconscious demands followed by judgment and disappointment.

Real spiritual growth -- true self-transformation -- depends upon what we are willing to give, and not upon what we feel we are owed.

http://www.guyfinley.org/free-content/writings/special-lessons/4668?src=KL&lyid=147000488&klsid=sid0000_KL

I've Learned...

ANDY ROONEY, TV COMMENTATOR, DIED RECENTLY AT AGE 92. 

 

 

 If you will take the time to read these. I promise you'll come away with an enlightened perspective. The subjects covered affect us all on a daily basis: 
They're written by Andy Rooney, a man who had the gift of saying so much with so few words. Enjoy... 
I've learned.... That the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person. 
I've learned.... That when you're in love, it shows. 
I've learned.... That just one person saying to me, "You've made my day!" makes my day.
I've learned.... That having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.
I've learned.... That being kind is more important than being right.
I've learned.... That you should never say no to a gift from a child. 
I've learned.... That I can always pray for someone when I don't have the strength to help him in some other way.
I've learned.... That no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.
I've learned.... That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.
I've learned.... That simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.
I've learned.... That life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.
I've learned.... That we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we ask for.
I've learned.... That money doesn't buy class.
I've learned.... That it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.
I've learned.... That under everyone's hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.
I've learned.... That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.
I 've learned....That when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you.
I've learned.... That love, not time, heals all wounds.
I've learned.... That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter than I am.
I've learned.... That everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.
I've learned.... That no one is perfect until you fall in love with them. 
I've learned.... That life is tough, but I'm tougher. 
I've learned.... That opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.

 

I've learned.... That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.
I've learned.... That I wish I could have told my Mom that I love her one more time before she passed away. 
I've learned.... That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them. 
I've learned.... That a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.
I've learned.... That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you're hooked for life.
I've learned.... That everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you're climbing it.
I've learned.... That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.

May the force of constructive anger be with you!!!

In September 1962, as King sat on the stage during an Southern Christian Leadership Convention, a white member of the Nazi party jumped up to the podium and punched him several times in the face.  As the security guards rushed to his help and pulled away the hate-filled youth, King responded, calmly, that he would not press charges. In response, he said in Martin Luther King on Leadership: "The system that we live under creates people such as this youth. I am not interested in pressing charges. I'm interested in changing the kind of system that produces this kind of man."   

Great leaders do not ignore their anger, nor do they allow themselves to get consumed by it. Instead, they channel the emotion into energy, commitment, sacrifice, and purpose. They use it to step up their game.  And they infuse people around them with this form of constructive anger so they, too, can be infused with energy commitment, sacrifice and purpose. In the words of King in Freedomways magazine in 1968, "The supreme task [of a leader] is to organize and unite people so that their anger becomes a transforming force.- http://www.inc.com/hitendra-wadhwa/great-leadership-how-martin-luther-king-jr-wrestled-with-anger.html?nav=next

Today is special.

Today is special.
Everyday is special.
Every moment in every day is special.
Each moment is a gift.
That's why it's called the present.
It's this moment.
It's every moment.
Each one a unique gift.
Each moment will never happen again.
But you let them slip away.
They're just little moments.
But they can be big moments.
Life changing moments.
When you appreciate each moment you create positive energy.
When you have that positive energy you attract
more positive situations into your life.
You also eliminate the negative situations.
When you don't have negative energy you don't
attract negative situations.
But instead of appreciating each moment you may complain.
You get angry.
You get frustrated.
Think about how things aren't working out for you.
You think about what's wrong with life.
You think about what you don't have.
You think about the struggle you've endured.
And so you create more negative energy.
That present, that gift, is being used to make your life worse.
You don't realize it but that's what you do when
you don't use the present to create more positive energy.
Your energy (positive or negative) is picked up
by your subconscious mind and your inner powers.
Others (those around you) pick up on your energy.
Bosses, colleagues, spouses, family, friends,
loved ones, children and even strangers pick up on your energy.
They just get a feel about you.
If it's negative - those who are positive and
optimistic will stay away from you.
And you'll attract more negative people.
They'll keep feeding your negative energy.
You'll keep attracting more negative situations.
And all those negative people around you will just
help you make the wrong choices.
Life just keeps getting worse.
So turn things around today.
Get rid of that negative energy.
Start appreciating the present.
Create positive energy in every present moment.
Focus on what you want.
Feed your subconscious mind and your inner powers
positive energy so that you begin to enjoy your life.


This day, this moment will never happen again.
Tomorrow, next week, next year, ten years
from now - it will be different.
It will always change and it will always be different.
Appreciate these precious moments - you won't get them again.
I know things may not be going the way you want them to.
That's okay.
Instead of thinking about what's wrong, think about what's right.
Appreciate even the smallest things - like a warm meal or
a place to sleep.
This kind of appreciation creates more positive energy.
It shifts your focus from the negative to the positive.
The positive energy, and the positive thoughts lead
to positive beliefs. This chokes off the negative energy.
You repel anyone and anything that is negative.
You attract more positive situations.
That's when things start to get better.
But if you always think about what's wrong with this
moment - you'll only create more misery and more struggle.
One step at a time.
Appreciate this moment.
Appreciate the next moment.
Appreciate as many moments as you can.
Just stop for a moment, and appreciate everything that's around you.
Go out and breathe the fresh air.
Appreciate the present, appreciate your life.
You have a gift in each moment.
Use that gift to create a better life by focusing
on the positive aspects.
Keep feeding your mind positive energy.
Keep directing your inner powers to create the life you want.
Give them the positive energy they need to create a positive life.
Positive energy attracts more positive situations.
Create that positive energy today

Little hinges swing big doors

 "Little hinges swing big doors". Small changes in expectations can lead to disproportionately larger increases in stress.  This fits the task of managing expectations. Tiny misses in expectations can lead to big swings in stress levels. 

The bottom line is that you must be clear in all of your instructions. It must be made clear what you expect from business partners, employees, printers, delivery men, your hairdresser, your real estate agent, your waiter, and on and on and on.

On the flip side, you must also be realistic and flexible. You cannot expect perfection. There will always be a few broken yolks in your life. But if you expect this to happen, then you'll have the mindset to manage the set-backs. How you manage your own expectations is equally as important ashow you manage the expectations of others. 

When working to increase your productivity, be clear about your work goals, your work environment, your work time blocks, and what you expect from your employees and team members in terms of honoring all of the above.

Make these expectations well known and communicate them clearly. It will save you a lot of hassle and stress over time. Stress is largely a factor of how your expectations are managed.

When running a business or managing employees, how you manage your own expectations and those of your team are critical to reducing stress and conflict. The solution to managing expectations is clear and concise communication. 

Do you want real Forgiveness?

By Guy Finley

Do you know people -- maybe who aren't even alive anymore -- that you haven't been able to forgive? Are there certain events in your life you just can't release? What you can't release isn't the person or the condition that you see as being the source of your pain. What seems to be "stuck" isn't an old situation you can't release... it's a thought. It's the negative effect of a certain order of mind that, in its darkness, lives as a prisoner of a past presence.

Over and over again, certain negative images -- crammed full of the conflict felt in the moment of their creation -- are unconsciously revisited by a part of us that actually wants that dark visitation. Why? Because this familiar pain confirms, in a very strong fashion, our certainty of who we are by re-creating what once happened to us in life. Something in our own mind actively recollects what it does from our past, regardless of how it wrecks the present moment for us. To be punished by any past presence is to be a prisoner of our own past.

A "prisoner mentality" is part of any thought or feeling that blames something outside of you for what amounts to self-induced pain. Was there a person who did something terrible? Yes. This planet is filled with toxic, cruel human beings -- victims themselves of a pain they can't escape. But does that mean that you should spend your life running, hiding, resenting what was? No! In a word, you aren't free of your own past because you don't see what's happening to you, within you, in the present.

Something, anything -- be it an event, a smell, a sound, a thought -- will stir the mind and call up within it the memory of a person, an event, a condition; and at that moment something in you grabs onto whatever it was that happened, and "bang!" -- bitterness, sorrow, regret, or rage results. With this suffering comes "proof" to the sleeping mind (that is revisiting its own images) of exactly who (or what) is responsible for this pain. Blame feeds the fire, keeping the self in place that feels as though the pain it has is due to the person it blames.

These thoughts and feelings that come flooding back into you are not your thoughts. They have no real right to be there, running through you unattended, ruining your life. But you grant them entrance to your mind and the power to make you ache every time you consent to relive what someone did or didn't do to you.

There is freedom in realizing -- seeing the truth of the fact -- that whatever is holding you captive right now has no right to do so. None! The split second that you see you're a captive of your own mind, you have the freedom to challenge it with the new understanding that belongs to your new, true mind -- a mind that can't be made a prisoner of anything.

If you want to have real forgiveness, it begins with giving yourself up each and every time some past presence presses its will in and upon you. Use the will of your new understanding to lay down your "self" when you see it's needed. Do this, and something new will rise where you once were -- free from the past -- which means you will be free to forgive.

Practice Automatic Writing

Unlike the development of other extra-sensorial abilities, automatic writing doesn't require long years of practice. 

Here's How To Proceed

Sit down comfortably at a table, preferably at night when vibrations circulate more freely, and your surroundings are calm. Have a piece of paper in front of you, and a pen or pencil to write with.
 
You can ask a particular person (someone you know who has died, or a Spiritual Master) a specific question, or you don't need to ask a question at all. I recommend doing the latter first, so as not to limit yourself, and facilitate communication between you and the higher spiritual realms. 

You can work with open eyes, or you can close them, whichever you prefer. Place the tip of the pen at the top of the piece of paper in front of you. After a certain amount of time it should start moving. Don't hold it back or try to control it in any way. Let it do what it wants. 

At first you may write only a few letters, or make some kind of doodle. But with a little practice, you should soon start writing complete sentences (you may need more paper). Some people have written entire books using this technique, and automatic writing is an amazing way to express your personal abilities and talents.